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Sand Castle Bay Page 16
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Emily took a long, hot shower after leaving Boone’s, left her hair damp to curl at will, pulled on a pair of shorts and a tank top, then headed for the porch where her sisters had gathered after dinner. Cora Jane, it seemed, had gone to the movies with Jerry.
“You and Boone make peace?” Gabi asked as Emily settled on the chaise longue with one of the fancy rum drinks Samantha had made. Samantha seemed to have developed a fascination with improving her bartending skills.
“I apologized,” Emily said. “I guess we’re okay, though he wasn’t very happy when I told him I’d be leaving soon.” To keep them from seizing on that, she quickly asked, “What about you two? Have you made plans to go home yet? Everything at the restaurant seems pretty much back to normal.”
“I’ll probably head back on Sunday,” Gabi said. “I’m getting some rumblings that my boss isn’t very happy that I’ve been gone this long. Amanda doesn’t consider being available via phone, fax and email every second to be sufficient dedication.”
“Any rumblings from the boyfriend?” Emily asked.
Gabi frowned at her. “He’ll be glad to have me home again, of course.”
“Of course,” Emily echoed dryly.
“Leave it alone,” Samantha advised. “You and I might not get why this guy has been AWOL the whole time we’ve been here, but it doesn’t seem to bother Gabi, and that’s all that matters.”
Reluctantly, Emily let it be. “What about you, Samantha? You heading back to New York?”
Her sister shrugged. “Not right away. My agent will call if something comes up, and it’s not as if I’m vital at that restaurant where I fill in as hostess from time to time. August is usually pretty dead in New York. Everyone who can takes vacation this month. I might as well hang out here a little longer.”
“That’ll make Grandmother happy,” Emily said. “Be careful she doesn’t figure out a way to talk you into staying for good.”
Samantha smiled. “Not likely. I may not be working as much as I’d like, but what work there is happens to be in New York.” She studied Emily. “But you intend to leave soon even though things between you and Boone aren’t resolved? Why would you do that?”
“What’s unresolved?” Emily asked. “His life is here. Mine’s on the West Coast. How are we supposed to find middle ground? Settle in Kansas?”
Gabi chuckled. “I think you could probably find a better alternative,” she said, then added diplomatically, “Not that there’s a thing wrong with Kansas if the man you love is willing to meet you halfway across the country.”
“I don’t think Boone is interested in compromise,” Emily said.
“And you?” Gabi pressed. “Are you willing to compromise?”
Emily was about to make some flip remark, but instead she actually gave the question some thought. Was there a compromise? Were her feelings for Boone still strong enough to be worth exploring? And how on earth was she supposed to find out if she kept running away? It was one thing to take off in search of some elusive goal at twenty-one. It was quite another to do it ten years later, when she should be smart enough to see that a successful career wasn’t quite as fulfilling as she’d imagined, that maybe there was more to life.
She was still thinking about that when the sound of a car engine drew closer, then cut off.
“Oh, boy,” Samantha muttered as they saw Boone turn the corner of the house and amble in their direction. “I’ll be inside if anyone needs me.”
“Me, too,” Gabi said, leaping to her feet with surprising agility given the two potent drinks she’d consumed. “Hey, Boone.”
Boone stood at the bottom of the steps, his gaze on Emily. “You going to run off, too?”
She smiled. “I think I’ve been rude enough for one day. Besides, this is my home. No one gets to run me off.”
“In that case, mind if I join you?”
“Why not? You want a drink?” She held up her half-empty glass. “I’m not entirely sure what Samantha put in this concoction, but it definitely takes the edge off.”
He shook his head. “That’s okay. Probably better if I keep a clear head for this conversation.”
He took a seat on the glider at the side of the porch, then set it in motion. To be honest, watching him made Emily a little dizzy. She frowned at her glass. “What the devil did Samantha put in here?” she murmured.
Boone chuckled. “Maybe I should make coffee.”
“It might be a good idea,” she conceded, “especially if you intend to say anything you want me to remember.”
“I’ll be right back,” he told her, then held out his hand for her glass. “You should probably be done with that.”
“Probably,” she conceded, handing it over, though with some reluctance.
Boone wasn’t gone long, just long enough for her nerves to quicken as she considered all the possibilities behind his unexpected appearance here tonight. When he came back with two cups of coffee, he set hers on the table beside her.
“You’d better let it cool off a little,” he advised, then went back to the glider.
“I’m surprised you’re here,” she blurted. “Wasn’t Ethan coming for dinner?”
“He came,” Boone confirmed. “One thing about having a really good friend who’s known you just about forever, they say stuff and you generally have to listen.”
“What kind of stuff?”
“In this case, about you and me,” he admitted.
Emily smiled. “Yeah, I’ve been getting a lot of that, too.”
“I have a feeling there’s some consensus on this,” Boone said. “What I keep hearing is that we’d be idiots not to give our relationship another try.”
“Pretty much what I’ve been hearing, too,” she confirmed. “Ethan said that, as well?”
“And a lot more,” Boone said. He finally looked her directly in the eyes. “I wish I honestly knew what we should do next, Em. From the minute you left town, I told myself not to look back. Then there was Jenny, and she made it easier to look forward. So did B.J. Now, Jenny’s gone, and here you are again.”
“And you see taking a chance on me as taking a step backward?” she suggested.
He nodded. “It might not be fair, but, yes.”
“Then why are you here, Boone? Seriously. Not even Ethan could persuade you to do something you didn’t feel right about.”
He shrugged, looking genuinely bewildered and surprisingly vulnerable. “Because I can’t seem to stay away,” he admitted with unmistakable reluctance. “You’re still in my blood, apparently, and I know I’ll kick myself from now till doomsday if I don’t seize this chance to see if anything’s left between us. Anything real, I mean, not just my memories and a few solid-gold fantasies.”
Despite all the positives in that response, Emily heard only the unspoken misgivings. “You don’t sound happy about this decision.”
He smiled. “Can’t say that I am. I always thought I was supposed to learn from my mistakes, not repeat them.”
Though she could have taken offense, she saw his point. Would it be a painful mistake to try to rekindle what once was?
“Maybe we should do this one day at a time,” she suggested, looking for that middle ground Gabi had mentioned earlier. “No pressure. No huge expectations.”
“But there is pressure,” he said. “You announced earlier that you’re leaving, and suddenly I feel as if we have to settle this in the next fifteen minutes or something.”
He gave her a sad look. “It’d be funny if it weren’t so tragic. Falling in love with you back then was so easy. I never once gave it a second thought. It just was, like the beat of my heart or breathing.”
“And now?”
“You tell me,” he said. “Does anything about this feel easy? The way I see it th
ere are complications galore, maybe even more than last time. Now we both have careers, we have established lives.” He gave her a wry look. “And I have in-laws who are just waiting for me to screw up.”
Emily frowned at that. “Meaning?”
“Jenny’s parents—well, her mother, anyway—would love nothing more than to find an excuse to sue me for custody of B.J. I’m trying really hard to avoid that. Not that Jodie could win, but she could make my life and B.J.’s hell for a while.”
Emily didn’t even try to hide her dismay. “Do you honestly think she’d be so vindictive?” she asked, finding it almost impossible to believe anyone would hold that sort of threat over a father’s head.
“I’d rather not find out,” he said.
“Then maybe being scared and cautious is smart.” she conceded. “Why rattle her cage for no good reason? And maybe most important, there’s B.J. to take into account. If we tried and it didn’t work and he got hurt, I know it would rip your heart out, but it would kill me, too.”
“Then what the heck are we supposed to do, Em?” he asked in frustration. “Give up?”
That would surely be the easy, safe choice, she thought. But was it what she wanted? She studied this man who’d once been the most important thing in her world, until her horizons had broadened. Here he was again, putting his feelings on the line. Had her horizons reached a more inclusive stage, one where there would be room for love and marriage and family? Or would she only wind up letting him down? Was she crazy for even considering starting over? Or was he the crazy one for giving her an opening to break his heart for a second time, especially if that custody threat was real?
Unfortunately there was no way to answer those questions without taking a chance. Life was full of risks. Avoiding them might be comfortable, but was it really living?
She stood up and took a tentative step in his direction, then gestured to the seat next to him on the glider. “Is it okay?”
He chuckled at her hesitation. “You afraid I might try to have my way with you?”
“More afraid that you won’t,” she admitted, settling next to him. He put his arm around her then, and she released a sigh. It felt exactly as she’d remembered. More than coming back to this house, this community, sitting here with Boone’s arm around her shoulders felt like coming home. He still smelled of the same citrus-scented aftershave, still felt solid and safe.
Now, if only he’d kiss her as if he meant it, the kind of kiss that had always been a prelude to much, much more. She turned to face him, only to see an amused glint in his eyes.
“Not the answer,” he murmured, touching a finger to her lips.
Only the apparent disappointment in his eyes made the firm response easier to bear.
“You sure about that?” she asked, not even trying to hide her frustration. “We could go for a drive, park someplace where it’s secluded and dark the way we used to.”
“I’m not sure of a lot,” he responded, “but I am sure of that. Making love to you would be easy and memorable, just the way it always was, but it doesn’t hold the answers.”
“Then what does?”
“You said it earlier,” he told her. “Time. We need to agree to give this a chance, see where it leads.”
It all sounded reasonable and sensible, except for one thing. “Boone, I am leaving. I can put it off a day or two, but I will have to go. What happens then?”
He held her gaze, then released a sigh. “I guess if we intend to pursue this, then we’d both better sign up for one of those unlimited calling and data plans. We might end up racking up a lot of frequent flier miles, too.”
She regarded him with surprise. It was an offer he’d never made back then, not that she’d have agreed to it. She’d been stubborn and so sure that a clean break was for the best.
“You could live with that? The whole long-distance thing?”
“Apparently I can’t live without you, so, yes, I’m willing to give it a try. How about you?”
She took a deep breath, then nodded. “I’m in.”
“And we give it our all, no looking for excuses to bail?” he prodded.
“Absolutely.”
“Okay, then,” he said softly, sounding relieved. “This might be for the best.”
“How so?”
“If this is a long-distance thing, we can keep B.J. out of the mix for now. And, by extension, the Farmers.”
Emily frowned. “I get it about the Farmers, but B.J.? You don’t want him to know we’re involved?”
“Not yet,” Boone said, then added earnestly, “We need to agree on that, Em. I have to protect him.”
She pulled away. “That sounds as if you’re already convinced we’ll fail.”
“No,” he said hurriedly. “Not at all. I swear to you I won’t hold back anything.”
“Except your son.”
“You know why,” Boone said. “It would be wrong to let him get his hopes up. When we’re sure it’s going to work out, of course he’ll know what’s going on. He’ll be thrilled to pieces. You know how crazy he is about you. And when we’re solid, I’ll find a way to deal with Jenny’s parents, a way to make them understand that being with you isn’t a slap in their face.”
Even though a part of her felt Boone was demonstrating a lack of faith in this relationship they intended to build, she couldn’t honestly deny that he was probably right to protect his son. After all, Boone had seen too many potential parents come and go. He knew firsthand the toll that could take on a boy’s emotions.
“You’re right,” she conceded. “What about my family? Are we keeping them out of the loop, too?”
“It could limit the meddling,” he suggested. “But I doubt we can pull it off. Besides, Cora Jane for one would be absolutely furious if she found out we’d been sneaking around behind her back. I don’t think I can hide it from her. How about you?”
“Are you kidding me? She’ll figure out the truth the first time she gets a good look at my face when you’re in the room.”
He laughed at that. “You could always claim it’s just wishful thinking on her part.”
“And deny her the satisfaction of knowing that her meddling might be paying off? That would be cruel. Let’s not make a big deal about it, though. If they figure it out, we’ll confirm it and leave it at that.”
“Given the fact that your sisters are probably hanging out the bedroom window over our heads right now, it’s probably a wise choice,” Boone said, raising his voice just a little.
“Blast it, Samantha. I told you that window squeaked,” Gabi complained.
“Congratulations, you guys,” Samantha called out, laughing, then made a point of slamming the window closed.
Emily gave Boone a wry look. “Want to take that drive now? Obviously privacy is not possible here.”
“Nah,” Boone said, pulling her close. “If I have my way, there won’t be any talking for them to overhear.”
She regarded him hopefully. “Is that so?”
He tucked a finger under her chin, leaned in and sealed his mouth over hers. This time there was no holding back. He kissed her as if there was no tomorrow.
“Oh, wow!” she murmured against his lips. “I remember this.”
“How about this?” he asked, slipping his hand inside her tank top.
“Oh, yes,” she said, her breath coming faster, her pulse scrambling. “Why do I feel like I’m seventeen again and panicky that we’re going to get caught?”
“Maybe because Jerry’s car just pulled into the driveway and I can hear your grandmother getting out now,” Boone suggested, laughing as he straightened her shirt. He winked at her. “We’ll definitely pick this up another time.”
For the first time since she’d arrived in Sand Castle Bay, Emily suddenly wasn’t quite as anxiou
s to leave. Not with that promise on the table.
* * *
Boone walked into his house after midnight to find Ethan settled on the couch, his shirt and prosthesis off, a blanket draped low and a ball game on the TV.
“You look comfortable,” Boone commented, sitting down and reaching into the bowl of popcorn on the coffee table and taking a handful. “How’s B.J.?”
“Down for the count a couple of hours ago. What are you doing home? Things didn’t go the way you’d hoped?”
Boone laughed. “They didn’t go the way you’d hoped. Me and Emily, we’re on the same page for the first time in years.”
“Together?”
“We’re hopeful,” Boone confirmed. “But we’re going to move slowly.”
“Is she sticking around?”
“No.”
Ethan frowned. “How’s that going to work exactly?”
“People have long-distance relationships all the time,” Boone replied.
“So I’ve heard. You ever heard of one that lasted?”
“It won’t be forever,” Boone said optimistically. “We’ll work it out. If it’s meant to be, that is.” He stood up. “I’m beat. I’m going to head up to bed. The guest room’s yours if you want it.”
Ethan gestured to the nearby prosthesis. “I’m good here, but I will stay the night if you don’t mind. Probably not smart to hit the road after that last beer.”
“Stay wherever you want. Need anything?”
“Not unless you can figure out a way for the Braves to pull this game out in the bottom of the twelfth. They’ve blown a lead four times tonight.”
“They’ll break your heart, all right.”
He left his friend to the game, stopped to look in on B.J., then went to his own room. He sat on the edge of the bed and picked up the snapshot of him, B.J. and Jenny taken the summer before she’d died. He looked at her face and thought he saw some of that joy Cora Jane had insisted was there.
“I did love you, Jenny, and I hope I did right by you,” he whispered, then sighed. “I just hope I’m not betraying you now.”
To his shock he thought he felt the whisper soft touch of a breeze on his cheek just then. He glanced across the room, but the windows were closed. His gaze returned to the photo.